Saturday, June 19, 2010

Seasons


I am a firm believer in our lives having seasons. You know, waves. Ebbs and flows.

Right now, I'm in a funny sort of season. I'm not quite myself. My priorities and goals and ideals are no different, yet my vision is a bit out of focus. My lens is a little misty. Yet, I'm not worried by this. I know the wave will shift, the breeze will blow, the lens will become clear again.

I would describe this season as being quite introverted. A shade of blue. I'm thinking a lot. My sleeping and eating patterns are all out of whack. I can't think of what to cook. I am exhausted but cannot sleep. I'm going through the motions, but my heart is not quite here. Where it is.... I'm not sure. It's just distant. Thoughtful. Perhaps gone into some form of self-preservation mode?

I apologise for having no photos to share! I don't even really feel like taking photos this week. Life has been fairly mundane (which I don't mind... I need the down time), and not really photo-worthy. But I'm sure I'll be my snap-happy self again soon. :) The children are all doing well.

I have been thinking a great deal about how to avoid burn-out lately. Why? Because.... I have been feeling some signs within myself and I'm striving to prevent them going further. Reading and seeking lots. This post is excellent.

I have been reading some great books. Just finished "Dancing With My Father" by Sally Clarkson, which was excellent. I am also in the middle of "Embrace Grace" by Liz Curtis Higgs. These are two of my favourite Christian authors, ladies who have so so so much wisdom to share. And Liz is so funny! :D It's good to laugh. The book is all about healing past pain, embracing God's grace and believing we are forgiven and whole and loved, just as we are. I am also re-reading Wuthering Heights, just for pleasure. :) It is wonderful.

And so life goes. Quiet right now, for me. Well, busy on the outside but quiet within. Dreaming and wondering and processing and praying.

Hope everyone is having a restful weekend.

7 comments:

Shonni said...

I really understand what you are going through. I have those seasons also. In fact, I kinda "took off" of school and chores this week - time to just breathe.
Praying for you.

Vic said...

Oh Min, this IS just a season, and it too shall pass and you'll be stronger for it. Until then let me know if there is anything I can do. xx

Amanda said...

That's why I love reading your blog - you tend to put into words what I have just been experiencing. I am having a "not sure what's going on/not quite myself season" but I'm actually glad for it because it is driving me back to God and helping me find joy in the little things. Bless you Saminda.

Smilie girl said...

Love to you. I'm sure the up coming school holidays might help with giving you a chance to rest and recover and see things a bit brighter again.
But there are definitely seasons and blue is a fine colour too. Hugs.

AmFriend said...

Ah burnout, something I am all too familiar with sensing. My job is very taxing and frustrating at times which leads to me feeling burnt out. I do not like these feelings AT ALL and am trying to seek peace and contentment. I will have to see if our library has Embrace Grace. Hugs and prayers for your and yours, A

Sherri said...

That was a very good post...one that most of us moms can relate too! Thanks!

Renata said...

Yes, you described my current season too. In fact I've been sick the last couple of days & I think the reason is because we've just been too busy & I haven't been able to have a day off - every Sunday is always hectic lately. I slept most of the last couple of days - which means I'm wide awake tonight. I'd better go to bed though as we have a full day planned for tomorrow.
Hugs to you
Renata

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